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After high school, Ryan and I lost contact completely. I went on to come out of the closet and move to the west coast. He went on to join the military, get married, and raise his children with his wife. We went on to two very different worlds.Now it's been twenty-four years since that night. I'm not a seventeen year old boy with my life ahead of me anymore. I'm a forty-one year old man who has known true love twice in my life and lost it both times. I had been out of the closet since my teens. I was as gay as they came. One of my former lovers moved me from Tennessee out to California, where we became part of the lively gay scene in San Diego. That relationship lasted for six years and then, we simply parted amicably.One night, I was at my computer searching through craigslist for a man around my age, not in the closet, not married, not into sucking and fucking and then never speaking to me again. As I perused the ads, I quickly found that would not be the case. Every single ad was. Anxiety stabbed at Ben, but he inched closer, into alien territory. He could make out voices now, and a faint cheering started to materialize. Against his better judgment, he followed the source of cheering, going deeper into the darkness. The sound he was following died away, and soon he was completely surrounded, boxed in by strangers who were dancing, writhing, laughing. Ben’s anxiety was on the verge of peaking as the flickering lights blinded him, and he made to ram his way to safety, when he heard it again.The high pitched cheers of girls were punctuated by an occasional ‘Whoop!’ A circle was formed around two figures, and as he came nearer Ben could make out the name ‘Alyssa’ being yelled. He looked over the tops of a few heads and saw a girl - that same blond girl from the mall, the same beautiful young woman who had watched as he was humiliated - locking lips with a boy.The crowd was cheering because two of the most popular k**s in the local high school were making out,.
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